How To Become A Better Listener – 6 Ways To Help

 

Sometimes it seems like listening is a lost art, perhaps as a result of how much more electronic communication there is in our lives. It is also one of the most important manners taught to us from the early stages of our lives. 

 

 

That’s unfortunate because having good listening skills can benefit you in all facets of your life, including interactions with close family and friends and coworkers. Want to become a better listener? Here are some tips to help you:

 

1. LISTEN IN ORDER TO LEARN, NOT FOR POLITENESS

Frequently, whether they are aware of it or not, people listen to each other out of charity rather than curiosity.

 

Listening is excellent, but the goal should be to learn, not to give. Real dialogue cannot take place when we only pretend to listen, and it cannot happen at all when we pay no attention at all.

 

2. SLOW YOUR CALENDAR

While you have no control over how someone else listens, you may influence your own listening style by calming your thoughts.

 

Really pay attention to what the other person is saying. Information that contradicts what we already know is what we need. We weren’t truly listening if we ever got through a talk and learned nothing unexpected.

 

3. CONTINUE TO QUESTION.

Asking more questions than you are answering is one of the simplest ways to improve your listening skills. By posing questions, you make it possible for others to tell you the truth without any filter.

 

Listening with real intent means “I’ll be open to being incredibly incorrect, and I’m comfortable with that in this conversation”.

 

Being able to listen is essential to removing unneeded conflict at any level, whether it be inside a team, business, or on a more general political country level, he says.

 

4. BE CONSCIOUS OF HOW MUCH YOU TALK AND LISTEN.

It is advised to aim for a 2:1 ratio of listening to speech. In meetings or talks, he advises note-takers to keep track of how much they listen versus how much they speak.

 

Mark off a section of the paper and list every conference call participant’s name. Mark a person’s name with a checkmark whenever they speak for more than a phrase or two.

 

That also applies to you. You might learn something from the graphic comparison of listening and talking.

 

5. REPEAT WHAT YOU HEARD.

A number of issues prevent people from fully understanding what another person is attempting to express.

 

“Am I assuming what the other person will say next? Is what is being said something I agree with or disagree with? Perhaps I’m agreeing too quickly and would later find myself disagreeing?”

 

Simply put, there is more potential for misunderstanding than there is for understanding.

 

Instead, service the active listening technique. It’s been around for a while and, if done correctly, it works wonders.

 

The fundamental idea is to tell the speaker what you heard again. You can continue if the speaker admits that what you heard matches what they wanted to say.

 

If not, the speaker must rephrase their argument until the listener is convinced that they do understand.

 

 

6. WAIT FOR SOMEONE TO FINISH BEFORE RESPONDING.

Waiting for a period at the conclusion of a sentence before crafting a response is the hardest part of listening properly.

 

When we start thinking about a response before the speaker is through, we lose both the whole information being delivered and a sense of the kind of emotion present in the speaker’s delivery.

 

This is risky because when you are more likely to be thinking about what you are going to say next rather than paying attention to what they have to say.

 

That’s fundamentally what’s happening; you are telling the world you are more significant than the person who’s talking to you. That is a self-serving attitude toward life and an uncomfortable moment of self-awareness.

 

The best listening involves letting go of control over your next words or any follow-up inquiries. Count on yourself to come up with an idea on the spot based on what the other person just said. That will strongly suggest to the other person that you are paying attention to what they have to say.